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Thursday, February 17, 2011

Wisconsin Democratic Senate Leader Vacation Plans

From the desk of Senator Mark F. Miller, Minority Leader, Wisconsin Senate:

Dear Democrat Colleagues,

I've been watching the weather quit a bit lately, and I have to tell you that it is just too cold here for me right now.  I know, I know, we're supposed to be in session, but honestly, how can we be expected to get any work done with fourteen feet of snow on the ground?  Seriously guys, it's cold up here.  What we need is a winter break.

Look, the Republicans are bound and determined to do whatever they want.  I don't know where they got the idea that just because they have majorities in both houses and the governorship they can pass whatever laws they like, but that seems to be their thinking these days.  So, since I can't accomplish any of my legislative goals anyway, and since it's colder than the Governor's heart, I say we get out of town for a while and hit the beaches down in sunny Chicago.  Have you seen the lake here this time of year?  I've gotta tell you, it's just plain beautiful.  I really don't know why I'd want to be any other place. 

Here's the thing.  Over the years, I've maintained a 100% rating with Naral, all the gun-control people, the Sierra Club, the gay-rights group and the public sector unions (except for those a******* cops who keep giving me a bad rating, probably because they don't like the 100% I got from the ACLU).  At any rate, it's obvious this year that all my hard-earned work was going to be shoveled aside like so much snow by the Republicans.  Then it occurred to me what I could do.  I could take a vacation, get a little sun and fun, a little r & r, some downtime, some me time, and at the same time I could keep the Republicans from doing anything, and I mean anything, at all.  All I have to do is leave town and get you guys to come with me.

It's perfect!  We have the new form of responsible government:  If you can't win the game, don't play!  We can take a vacation and still keep all of our special constituents happy!  The unions will love us for this, after all it's a move right out of their playbook.  Don't work, shut everything down, and make sure nothing happens until the other side caves to our demands.  I really don't see how anything can go wrong.

So, until the next election cycle and we get our majority back, join me down here in sunny Chicago, grab a Chicago-style pie and a Bulls game, and let's enjoy our winter break.

Your friend a leader,

Wisconsin Senate Minority Leader Mark Miller

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